Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Rejection and other things that Piss You Off

Will there ever be a time when I can laugh at rejection? I don’t know the answer to that question. I shouldn’t complain because my reactions to rejection have come a LONG way in the past few decades. I remember when I was a young artist; I would fall into a heap and cry. Geesh…..that isn’t a pretty memory!! LOL LOL I am not like that anymore. No, now I get really ticked off and angry! However, even this reaction bothers me. I want to become so secure that I have no reaction. I want to feel no emotional push or pull when told “WE DON’T WANT YOU OR YOUR ART!” Yes, I want to be able to turn around and walk away without any kind of positive or negative reaction. I just want to BE at that moment. I don’t know if I will ever get there though. Maybe.
In the past 24 hours, I have been rejected three times. One was “day job” related. One incident involved an Internet transaction. The last was a rejection notice from a gallery show. Needless to say, I am not in a joyous mood at the moment. I feel very moody and cross. I have tinges of feeling unwanted and ignored. This is a big pet peeve of mine. (You know one of those: you were put on this earth to learn lessons type of deals. Well, accepting rejection must have been and still is one lesson I am working to master.)
Yes, I am angry. However, I am not really angry with my rejecters. I am angry at my reaction to the rejections. I am mad at myself for letting it bother me so much I am writing these words. I know better. This is especially true in reference to the gallery show. I have been a juror and a curator. I have sat many times with other jurors while they juried shows. I know full well that in many cases if a piece of art doesn’t get into a particular show, it doesn’t mean it is bad, undeserving, or anything negative. I could mean bunches of other things too. It wasn’t the style for which the juror was looking. It may not fit into the theme of a show. It was too bright. It was too dull. It was acrylic and the juror prefers oil. It was too traditional or too avant-garde. It could be anything. That is why I am angry. I know better!
My favorite rejection story (and lesson) came in the late 80’s. I had entered some pieces in a local gallery show. They were all rejected. I cried all the way down to the gallery when I went to pick them up. There was another gallery show seeking entries in the next city. Without unpacking my truck, I drove directly to the other gallery and dropped off the same work. I not only got into the show. I also won $500. I learned a life long lesson that day. You just never know. Rejection isn’t really about you or your art. It is about other things. Now, I just have to remember those words of wisdom myself!!




"Anger"
Click to Enlarge
Acrylic / Mixed Media on Wood
24 X 24

1 comment:

gilda said...

Hi Sheree!
great to see your blog......I've got your URL posted on my safari toolbar, right next to Ann's blog so I can check in every day!