Thursday, June 5, 2008

Art Blog: So NOW what?

Today was the last day of my “day job”. I don’t have to report back to duty until August whatever. I have a good eight weeks to find a new life or at least, keep the wheels moving. It was so strange today. I was alone in my school art room and I was packing up MY stuff and THEIR stuff. I wanted to make sure I got most of my own possessions separated and put in special spot because I am coming for it. (I HOPE!) I don’t even like saying it that way. It implies I might be back there to work. I know, I know….eight weeks isn’t a long time to get a new life going. There is a possibility I might have to go back. I don’t even want to think of that right now. I am staying positive and just moving on thought-wise. When I arrived home from work, I could feel the stress lift off me only to be replaced by the question “Now WHAT?”
My “To Do” list is ever growing. It is so ironic I had planned on being immersed in a painting frenzy this summer. I wanted to work in my studio EVERY DAY! As I left school, even the janitor who doesn't know what is going on in my life said to me "Have a great summer! Don't paint TOO MUCH!!". I laughed and smiled as I walked away. Oddly enough, the first week of my “list” doesn’t include art at all. This is so horrible. Also, I am sure many of you artists will relate. Life happens. I have to prep stuff for job interviews. Try to find (dust off) some outfit to wear that are “interview worthy”. (This should be interesting since I haven’t applied for a job in umpteen years!) I have to try to make sense of my house and studio which looks like the county dump site due to bringing home so much crap from my job and the list goes on………….
I must say, writing a blog does help. I want to find my true self again. Time and comfort zones have made me far too complacent. Yesterday’s post helped me to start thinking outside of the box. It started to give me my courage back. I am finally letting all kinds of possibilities enter my mind. Now, all I have to do is figure out what I truly want. I know the quick answer: “I want to be a happy artist!” So, I guess the real question is “What will it take to make that happen Shereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee???”"
Click for larger view


Mad William said...

That's always the big question isn't it? What's going to make us happy?

You at least have a head start. You know you're an artist.

Best of luck with your summer.

Sheree Rensel said...

Great minds think alike. If you check out today's post, I mention a few more "at leasts". You are right. I am an artist. That is VERY good! I like that part of my life. There are bunches of other things that are hopeful too. I am in a far better position now than ever to be able to make a transition to something different while holding onto the good parts of my life. Stay Tuned!!
P.S. Hope things are going well for you. Hang on!!