Friday, March 20, 2009

Art Blog: How did I get so LUCKY?

Sometimes, I ask my special ed students who need a glimmer of hope,

“HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY? HOW DID I GET TO HAVE A STUDENT AS SPECIAL AS YOU???”

I say this intentionally and sincerely. They need to hear it. I need to say it. We all win. I feel the same way about my art life. I have been through a whole lot of changes in the past few decades. This afternoon, I heard a sound outside. I stood up from the computer and gazed out onto a busy street in St. Petersburg. Strands of a Japanese Plum tree obstructed my view. As I watched the cars wiz past by my picture window, I scanned my art house walls. I had a flashback to my roach infested apartment on Third Ave. in Detroit back in the 80’s. For a quick moment, I felt like I had been hit in the head with a bat. I mean back when I lived in the Third Ave. “estate”, I could never predict I would be able to look out of MY house or any house. I never even expected to own a Japanese Plum tree. I never expected abundance. This is all so weird.

I have always supported myself and my daughter. Even during the MINUTE I was married, I was the bread winner. I am a boot strap kind of girl. I have had all kinds of jobs. You name it, I have done it. (Well, nothing illegal!!!) I just wanted to make enough money to support myself, my daughter, and my art. Yeah, I had degrees. However, if it took doling out Mexican food, working in factories, and doing whatever would bring a buck to make my life happen, I would do it if it helped me make art. That has always been my primary goal.

I just got a shipment of new birch wood painting panels. I took one out of the huge box and laid it on a table. I looked at it. I looked at it again. It is so beautiful. I remembered when I was happy to have a piece of jagged plywood on which to paint. I remember this. I can remember that yearning feeling. This is why I am so appreciative of my art life right now. I have pristine, birch wood panels now. Rather than be so humble and inquisitive, I will admit, I have worked my butt off for all this. WOW.
How did I get so lucky?



Looking at the bare wood, I can’t explain or express the magnitude of my delight. The most exciting thing is as I gaze at the blank surface is I have great ideas!

Like I asked: How did I get so lucky?

2 comments:

gilda said...

This is exactly how I feel when I stop and survey where I am and what I am doing....
From those days of doing telephone sales or working in the parking lot to having a great job and a wonderful studio.

I pinch myself.

Sheree Rensel said...

LOL LOL LOL Gilda! I had forgotten about your telephone sales and parking lot jobs! Shoot! That is why I love the fact I have known you so long. In fact, you are the one friend I have who has known me the longest!
You know what we have gone through to get HERE now! I remember so clearly inviting you and Boz over to that crappy little studio on Third for dinner. We sat on the floor and ate lasagna I bought with food stamps! LOL LOL LOL That part was fun, but the those times were so hard. I pinch myself too now. I never expected to be doing as well as I am now.
WE HAVE COME A LONG WAY BABY!!!!!