Wednesday, January 11, 2012


This post is dedicated to all the people who want to redesign their lives. It is so scary and precarious. However, I truly believe in the end it will be worth it.

I walked into a room today at work and people looked at me in a strange way. I stopped in my tracks and said “I know why you are staring; I am SMILING and you don’t recognize me!!” LOL LOL LOL I don’t know why I am smiling in some ways. I shouldn’t be. Some might think I just threw my life down the toilet. I don’t believe this to be true at all. Oh yes, I am at risk big time. There is the possibility I could lose everything I have worked so hard to accrue for all my years on earth. That is possible, but not probable.

I have lived on this earth for a long time. I have worked most of my life. I am a “bread winner”. I have worked very, very hard too. Yet, there is a little part of me that is amazed I have made it this far. I got through college and university without rich parents. I raised a kid all by myself. I have held the home fort all alone for decades. I have gotten awards for doing what I do best: art and educating. Who would have thought??

Yet, I decided to throw in the towel on my middle class salary and look for other opportunities. How dare I? How could I do this? It is such a gamble and so risky. Money has never been my motivator. Happiness and contentment trump wealth for me. It always has. I figure (I hope), I have a few more decades in me and I want to go out with a BANG! I want to be the true SHEREE once again. You see, I had the stuff. I had an OK job and a credit rating. However, I am so unhappy it was obvious it is time for a redo. I want to give myself the opportunity for the real Sheree to show her stuff once again. I will too given the opportunity!

I am facing total uncertainty. I have never been to Vegas. I have never played a gambler’s hand, so to speak. I am now. Deal those cards! I am ready to win or fold. I just have to take this risk. I have to because I want to smile again.

One of the best things that happened today is a colleague came up to me and said she admired my courage. She said there are others who wish they could do the same thing. They will not move on because they are afraid. I am not afraid. Well, I am a little afraid. However, I am not going to let FEAR rule my life.

“Gambler / That Risk”
Mixed Media
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Sheree Rensel
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