So after giving my notice, I had to go pack up all my belongings and fill my SUV up with all my teaching props, gear, and toys. When I was in my art room, there was a little part of me that wished a Super Hero would rush in and tell me it would be OK. We fixed it! We want you to stay! I really thought that! Packing boxes in the darkened room, I kept thinking the warden would call and announce the reprieve. I will not get the death penalty after all! Yet as the hours passed and I kept packing, lifting, and loading, nobody came to say anything. I was all alone feeling kind of crappy, but a bit relieved all at the same time. I have always known there are no super heroes or super anything for that matter.
So now I have all my art teaching junk polluting my own art studio. One big pile of mess. It reminds me of my life right now. It is kind of a wreck. It is so funny because so many times in my life I have been told to concentrate more on my art. However, I am always in such fear because of money. My art is not "commerce qualified", so to speak. I don't want it to be either. If it sells it sells, if not, I have always had my paycheck. This sounds so cliché, but maybe now is the time to just "BE AN ARTIST". Maybe I should rely on my own super powers?
I can find simpler jobs to pay bills. I have always figured out a way to support myself and have done a very good job for five decades. Maybe I am weird for thinking this way, but it just has to be time for me now. Things will work out. I have no idea why I was thinking someone would run into the art room and rescue me. That is nonsense.
I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN MY OWN SUPER HERO!
I have always been crazy like this.